So Christmas is over. Blah. I really love holidays and Christmas is my absolute favorite but this year I just fell into a major funk. I was so excited to spend time with family and I had finished shopping pretty early so I felt like, for once I was prepared. But somehow things seemed to just pick up speed and before I knew it I was ready for a full blown meltdown.
The month began with a birthday party for my two December babies and we rolled right from that into family visiting and early Christmas celebrations. It was so awesome to have both sisters in town and to watch all of our kids play together but I literally didn’t feel like I took a minute to breathe. Which probably has a lot to do with why I came down with strep throat in the midst of everything. I am one of those people who can get really agitated if things don’t go how I expected and the whole sick thing just threw me for a loop. Just as I was getting over that curveball we got a call that my Papa (my mom’s dad) had passed away. He had a long struggle with alzheimers so it was a relief of sorts to know that he passed peacefully but as with any death it just isn’t easy to deal with the fact that someone you love is no longer here.
Things have been frenetic to say the least and it just didn’t all hit me until Christmas Eve. I was so excited to get home and just relax with Taylor and the boys but my nerves were shot. Ever had one of those moods where you are so anxious/bitter/agitated/sad/crazed that you just don’t know how to snap out of it? Well that was me for most of my two favorite days. I wasn’t very pleasant to be around although I gave it somewhat of an effort and sadly I spent most of our “quality family time” throwing myself a good ole pity party. For no real reason other than I just had let everything become too overwhelming.
So New Year’s resolution #1…put my mental well-being at the top of the list. I realize that it’s not only unhealthy for me to let things get to the point of making me crazy but it’s also unfair to my family. I have prided myself of being the one in our family that can keep it all together and not become stressed but I
have to HAVE TO accept that I do have more on my plate now and that means I have to be more conscience of what I take on. Emotionally, physically, mentally…I have to find a good balance so that I don’t reach the end of my rope.
The hardest part of all for me is just allowing my husband to cheer me up. Sounds stupid but I am telling you that when I get stressed like this I am downright difficult. My poor husband has spent most of his days off trying to just get me to buck up and I have made it very hard for him. Today he finally saw a glimpse of the light at the end of this tunnel by taking me to two very special places…Zoe’s Kitchen for lunch and West Elm for retail therapy. I was almost embarrassed by how quickly a turkey sandwich and rug shopping turned my mood around. Buying a new light for our dining room and the finishing touches for a client project made me feel lighter and back to my old self!
So although I am thoroughly disappointed in how I let this holiday get away from me, I am trying to find the positives and this is what I can come up with: